Friday, July 3, 2009

If Dogs Could Speak (they would tell me where to go)

I am sitting at home this evening with Nick because Ash is out of town for an art festival where he is playing "Viva La Vida" by Coldplay (he composed/transposed it to his violin) in a smoky bar.
Not really, since most of the bars are non-smoking these days, but Mr. Funny always said he hoped Ash didn't end up with a music performance degree playing in a smoky piano bar somewhere.
(Actually I think they are on the square downtown, but there are some bars there. I know because someone told me there were. I personally do not go to bars. Hardly ever. Except sometimes. OK! FINE! I have been to a few of the downtown bars. With my sisters. Are you happy now?!!)
He is completely enrolled at UMKC and is so happy to have FINALLY made the decision.
I think he is more happy that he will be so far from home.
The other college came up with more scholarship money all of a sudden but it is too late.
I need to make sure he is enrolled in a dorm and see who he is rooming with and when he can move in. Then it will become expensive again with all of the towels and sheets and mini-fridge and books and such.
Just 6 weeks away.

I have been on a weight loss plan for the past few days and so far I am doing well.
I have not had a diet Coke or any junk food (although I am going to be realistic and not deprive myself completely) and last night I grabbed the iPod and took 3 dogs (one at a time) around the neighborhood. It was a few miles and I walked fast and by the last lap, I felt great! (the first lap I was hoping a car would come around the corner and plow me down and knock me out, that is how out-of-shape I am)
I took Miss Molly, fresh from her spa day, and she was feeling good too. Nothing like getting your bath, pedicure, ears cleaned and anal sacs expelled to cheer a girl right up.
Oh, and according to the lady at the doggie spa, she(Molly, not the lady) also had "her twat shaved"
My mother would have peed herself to hear this lady say the word "twat."
I almost said "well, I was really hoping for a Brazilian wax" but I stopped myself.
I still want Molly to be my friend and things like that get you a steaming pile of you-know-what at the foot of your bed.

Which, coincidentally, was what we woke up to.
(shit)
3 piles to be exact.
I am going to blame it on the leftover Chinese food that I shared with them last night and not the "shaving of the nether regions" punishment from Miss Moo.
(Because a smooth hoo-ha is just what a girl needs on a summer day.)
All I have to say is "thank you" for the subtle yet stinky reminder.
The bedroom was due for a shampoo anyway.
"The Big D", my mom called it.
And no, not Diptheria. Although that might have been more pleasant.

I went to pick up a couple pair of denim capri pants, because I hate shorts ('cept my bermudas) and jeans are too hot. I also found a beautiful white gauzy blouse and some sandals.
Have I mentioned that I wanted a pair of gladiator type sandals?
I did and I found some Madden Girl sandals today when Mr. was buying some new work shoes. It was buy a pair, get the 2nd half off so who was I to waste a 4th of July sale? I will have to take a photo because I am happy when I can find pants that fit in all the right places and I have not had new sandals yet this summer.
And I feel like I can share this joy with you.

Soon, it will be time to buy school clothes for the boys and it will not be all about me, but today it was.
I plan to be thinner and in better physical shape (meaning I can look at pictures of myself and not squint and sweat and shake and wonder what the crap happened to me in the last few years) and be a healthier eater by fall.
I am turning 40 in December and I want to be ready for that surprise cruise Mr. Funny wants to take me on. Or that trip to Florida. Or Vegas. Or Aruba. Or wherever we go.
I will leave it up to him.
I have some big dreams don't I?
Anyway, I will be ready for whatever happens, or doesn't.

I promised the dogs a walk so I need to get going.
I hope I don't pass out from all this exertion.
Trying on pants took a lot out of me.


While we were walking, a kid shot off a firework and it shot down his driveway right at Kona's feet and popped and she jumped with ALL FOUR FEET straight into the air and I learned what it is like to sprint like an Olympian because she took off like a shot and there I was flying behind her like a hot air balloon; meanwhile, Skip had his 2 inch tail tucked between his legs the rest of the trip.
I am pretty sure it was to hold in the poo poo which was scared out of him.

3 comments:

  1. That's a cute outfit :)

    I would have never guessed your age.I was thinking about 33 or so..then again my best friend is 38 and she looks so young as well :)

    I can't believe you're about to turn 40 this year, that's just hard to grasp..you look much younger..I think 40 is the new 30 by the way :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Those sandals are too cute! I want to copy you... Where did you find them?

    ReplyDelete
  3. the story about the firework and the dog was funny to read, but I'm sure it was not funny when it was happening; poor dogs, they just don't like that type of loud noise

    like your outfit! I'm with you; I don't like to wear shorts, I like the capri length; I'm (gasp) 51 and I just think its good to leave the shorts to those that have better knees than I do

    good luck with your healthy eating plan (I like that better than the word diet). I know you'll get to your goal!

    betty

    ReplyDelete

Show some love♥ leave a comment

Awards I Have Received:

Awards I Have Received:
Thanks Janet!

Thank You Stacey!

Premios Dardo (Top Dart)

Premios Dardo (Top Dart)
Thank You Angela!

Thanks Deanna!

Splash Award

Splash Award
Thanks Stacey!

Meme Award

Meme Award
Thank You Stacey

Thank You Wife O Riley!

Thank You Cindi!

Thank you Stacey!

Thanks Stacey!

Thanks Katie!