I have a few complaints and then I will be finished.
- I am not and will never play Farm Town or Farmville on Facebook. I checked it out, it was a time waster (and I have too many of those don't I, BLOG?) I am not sending trees or sheep or chickens, I am not raking leaves etc... on anyones farm.
- I am sick and tired of coming home from work, the store etc... and finding dishes in the sink, laundry all over the floor, hungry dogs, a dishwasher full of dirty dishes or clean (run it and empty it) or carpets that need to be vacuumed.
- I am sick of people telling me they are out of socks, underwear, and shorts.
Also, telling me you have no underwear (when you have a drawer full of boxers but want to start wearing boxer-briefs) in front of 2 of your female friends the second I walk in the door from work is going to get you an embarrassing lecture which will involve said girls taking my side on your supreme laziness.
It is summer vacation. For you. Not for me. Ever.
- If you are The Husband and you see that the toilet might need a quick scrub, knock yourself out. There are 4 toilets in this house, 1 for each of us to clean. (I pick the half bath in the basement)If there is stuff beginning to grow in the toilet, it is not a new pet- it is The Wife asserting her disgustedness with all of you.
- If the dogs are staring at you, they might need to go to the bathroom, or be thirsty or hungry. If I am not home, I have a cell phone and can fill you in on their feeding schedule. If the water dish is empty, we have magic water that comes out of the faucet. Again, I can give a class.
Which brings me to the next complaint.
- Cheez-its are a snack food. So is cheese in a can, Oreos, animal crackers, grapes and cheetos. (are you people mice?) It does not count as a meal.Make a sandwich, cook a microwave dinner, make some pasta, eat some of the apples, oranges and bananas that rot every week. Make a hoagie pizza. Stop drinking a gallon of sweet tea and the entire carton of oj in one day and then complaining the rest of the week that we have NOTHING to drink. Again, water comes out of the faucet. And out of the door in the fridge. Sodas should last more than a few days. One a day is enough.
- If you use a cup (or 12) a plate or a bowl, put it in the silver box. It is a dishwasher. It is magic. It cleans things.
- If you have kleenexes, (people with yearlong allergies) papers, or trash from fast food places, put them in the trash can.
It is located in the trash closet. I can show you where we keep it.
If it is overflowing, take it out to the larger trash can. Located next to the garage. Trash day is Wed. Get all of the household trash out on Tues. night.
- I have a notebook computer. It is password protected because it is MINE. I do my jobs around the house and in turn, I get to blog.You sit on the computer from the time you get up, hang out on Xbox all day in the basement and then throw a giant cow if I say to help out.That is OVER!!!!!!!! You now earn special computer and video game time by helping out. I hide the controls, mouse and wireless keyboard and disable the touchscreen.