I had to work today.
At the restaurant, not my usual "work around the house to no avail, Saturday".
Mr. Funny was cooking today because we are still short one cook (since the loser left) (I still do not miss him!) and I could either manage, or cook.
He fits right in with the other monkeys at the zoo, torturing the waitresses and making tiny little odd-shaped pancakes and telling everyone that is how we have decided to serve them from now on.
Then he made a doughnut run and had the audacity to get glazed and filled only.
No cake doughnuts for me. (he did get me a Reeses and a pack of gum though so I can forgive)
When I finally got my cash drawer changed out and counted, I was hungry and ready to go home and get dressed to go out for our Saturday night date night. (and food from anywhere else but our place)
It was only 3:00.
Ok, a little early but Mr. Funny stayed behind to make sure that they didn't get hit with some of the gospel music crowd (there is a convention for the next week or so)
I am currently waiting for him to get home and I am now beyond starving.
Apparently not as starved as the dogs because Nick slept the day away and Ash went to work and "forgot" to feed them. Even though I called this morning to remind him.
Bu-bye Facebook! I kicked him off.
He has to work for us tonite for us as a cook and if any of you have heard me talk (lovingly) about Ash, he is the farthest thing from a cook ever. He does not use the oven or stove and the microwave is confusing. If we are out of cheez its and squeeze cheese, his eyes roll back in his head and he shivers and sweats and he bellows "mom, there is no food in this house, don't you people ever go to the store?"
So, when we told him he would have to pitch in a bit with the family business, he was happy (ha!) to work a few shifts because that is what families do.
Actually, it was more like us threatening to take his car keys and computer privileges and only sending the bare minimum in college spending money (that will probably happen anyway)
He has had to do one double shift (he works 3 hours a day, 3 days a week at Wendy's) so far this week and this will be his second.
He was exhausted already (really? are you kidding me?) and feeding the dogs was the end.
He left all pissy at me, but he did throw in an "I love you mom" before he slammed the front door.
I always told him (or any of us) to say I love you before he leaves in case something bad happened and we never saw each other again.
It is 4:40.
Where IS my husband?
There is nothing to eat.
Don't these people ever go to the store?
Oh......... that would be me.
And by golly, there ARE cheez its and squeeze cheese.
Last night the boys-who-practicall- live-in-my basement (that I did not give birth to) informed me that it smelled bad down there.
The bathroom had nasty water along the baseboards and around the toilet and the shower was full of water.
The sump pump is out of commission.
We were wet-vacuuming it til all hours and then I had to bleach it until I was satisfied that no more fowl water had touched any surfaces floor again.
The plumber will be here Monday.
Let us all say a prayer that the pump does not have to be replaced at the tune of $5000.
Now if you will excuse me, there is a full-bellied Jack Russell that I need to remove from my upholstered kitchen chair.
What goes on around here when we are gone all day?
I cannot find my web cam.
It is no longer sitting at the top of my screen or I would show you my hair, which looks the same except a little blonder and a little shorter.
I look a lot like this:
Except hungrier and less deranged.
And a different shirt and necklace.
But more like this:
(in my dreams)