Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Our lives have been turned upside down the last couple of weeks.

I don't want to get into any specific details today because I don't have the energy. I will say that my MIL's cancer is more advanced than I first believed it to be and the prognosis from a medical standpoint is grim. 
Still, she has an appt. back at Barnes Jewish a week from tomorrow to discuss all of their test findings and at that time they will set up an appt. with a local oncologist.Let me be very clear that we are not giving up. Miracles happen and doctors are mistaken every day. We are also not naive, God already knows the outcome and he is in control.

The big one has been back at home and still works for us. He is doing his own laundry, helping around the house and is easier to get along with. He is also still messy and short tempered at times with his brother and I but for the most part, it has been a huge change. If I can get him to work on the mess in the garage that he left when he dumped his many containers of college crap (clothes, dishes, food, sheets and towels, school supplies and dorm decor) soon, we will dance in victory. He is getting a tough lesson in the price of gasoline and I have limited his trips to friends and such. He is going to bed at normal hours because work starts at 8am and he doesn't want to set a bad example since he is the bosses kid. He stopped taking his prescription allergy drops at college last fall and is having a time of it. Since he missed so many doses, he is back to Zyrtec and Allegra D. 

The little one has the beginning of a sinus infection. He went to the doctor today and started an antibiotic and some Zyrtec. Allergy season is bad so far this year at my house. We are using saline spray, neti pots, OTC allergy meds and steam facials like crazy.
Let me say that there is much nose blowing at any given time around here with the snot twins.
The little one got his ACT results and class ring last week. We will try to improve his score a few points with the tutor we had for the big one. His ring is so awesome! He had a competition last week for his German 2 class and did very well. School is out at the end of this month and he is so ready but his grades are amazing and we are very proud. He wants to go on a camping trip with a few friends this weekend (on some land that one of his friends has)
The big one said, "aren't there bears?" and my husband answered with, "nah, just coyotes and cougars" to which the big one replied, "older women in the wilderness looking for young guys? look out"   HA!

My husband's sister came from New Jersey Friday to surprise us and spend time with their mom. She has 3 little kids and had to get back home today.We had a nice visit and she had a hard time leaving.

My MIL's sister has been here since Thursday and plans to stay as long as she is needed. This takes a lot of worry off of us so we can try to work out the many kinks at work. She helped my MIL with my FIL when he was diagnosed with cancer years ago and they are very close.

It doesn't look like we will be able to get away this month after all. Eureka Springs is going to have to miss us!

The weather is improving again this week. The rain seems to be gone and the sun is out.

My husband has to get his gallbladder out within the next 3 months. They found some polyps in it right after his tick illness and the doctor has a concern that the polyps could turn to cancer so it needs to go.

I have somehow messed up my back. It is the lower right side and wow, it hurts to sit, stand, lift or sleep. I have been using Motrin and Advil and sleep with the heating pad on my side all night. 
I have been so tired lately. I handle stress badly and sleep is the way I deal with it. I get up, take the little one to school and go back to bed. On days I work, I come home and take a nap. I get up in time to feed the dogs and the kids and then I am exhausted again and go to bed. I sleep badly and wake up all through the night. Then I wake up tired and start over. I bought workout clothes and charged my iPod and loaded it with good songs to walk to but I am literally too tired to think and barely make it upstairs to my bed. If anyone has any advice (no antidepressants please) I will take it. A friend suggested vitamins D and B but I don't know how much to take and what form.

I need to get to bed.


  1. Sending prayers your way! I will send you an email about my suggestion. It's kinda weird. lol Don't want people to think I'm crazy!

  2. Wow girl. You are dealing with a lot. My prayers are with your MIL. You are right, she is in God's hands - just as we all are. Hopefully they can find a treatment for the cancer that will work.

    Good news on the kids. It sounds like the big one had a bad case of the terrible teens and is finally coming out of it. And the little one... great!

    Your friend's advice is a good one. Vitamin D is very important. B is too. And don't forget the multivitamins and calcium. I would recommend you go to the Dr. and have a blood test done so they can identify if you are low in any vitamins. Getting your body in sync is key to more energy. I'd also advise to make yourself get out there and walk - even if it is just around the block at the start. Good luck to you. Hugs.

  3. I would recommend a regime of a full set of vitamins. I do a multi (any basic one will do), folic acid, B-Complex, calcium, and fish oil. The B and the multi make a big difference. I also take my Juice Plus, which is expensive, but helps with veggie intake or lack thereof, but it is not cheap. Honestly, there is a huge difference in how I feel when I take my vitamins each day. You can research online the vits that help with depression as I know there are several that help, but many of those can be found in multi vits without having to do all separate ones.

    The situation sucks and you are fine to be depressed about it. Honestly, I have cried a lot since you told me the other day. I even told the boys because they were freaked out by my crying. I just keep thinking about how she was the one who taught Big how to smell flowers. There is something so poignant about that. However, for some odd reason, I cannot for the life of me find those pictures in my files. Very odd. I will keep looking.

    It is all in God's hands and his plan for her was written long before this. All you can do is take care of her and yourself. Eureka will always be there, but a sister's weekend somewhere might be in order soon.

  4. I have a book (New Foods for Healing) it says B vitamins, vitamin C and mineral selenium, convert amino acids into mood-lifting neurotransmitters. Studies also show that people with depression have low levels of folate.

    Having a light snack before bedtime will give your body a message that it's time to sleep. The reson is that eating draws blood into the gastrointestinal tract and away from the brain, when you draw blood away from the brain, you are going to get sleepy.

    Also, do not nap during the day, no alcohol (sorry), cut back on cafffeine, take a hot bath 2 hrs before bedtime and call me in the morning (kidding).

    It really sounds like you are going thru a lot of stress, try to focus on good things in life. I know it can be hard but the show must go on and why not do it with your head up and shoulders back. Good luck.

  5. I can't beleive school is winding down already! How fun to get his ring! tutoring is always good to help the next time around with the ACTs. He'll do just fine!

    glad to hear all is going well with Big One too! They do mature, WTG for him stepping up to the plate!

    I am sorry about your MIL, I know it is hard and I know you are trusting God which is all we can do. It is great she has a great support system in you and in her sister!

    Do take care of yourself. If you need the extra sleep right now, take it. I "suck" on taking vitamins so can't give any advice there.

    praying for you all

    hugs to you all


  6. Oh dear. I will put your MIL on my prayer list.
    And you too!

  7. Praying for you, your mother in law and your family.
    Cherish all the time you have together!
    Your son is growing up. Wonderful!
    My fiancee started taking vitamins. He said they make him feel better.
    Try to take a weekend or a couple of days and just focus on you, resting up and getting caught up on your sleep as much as you possibly can. (I just recently spent a weekend sleeping and doing nothing, it was much needed and I recommend it big time!) Take care sweet lady.

  8. Your poor hubs with the polyps, and your MIL...oh my gosh, so much going on!

    Love how your oldest threw the cougar line out there. Too funny! And how great that your youngest is rocking the grades. Woohoo!


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