I'd like to clear a few things up for the commenters who inquired, shall we say (I deleted the comments because the commenters weren't kind enough to use their names)
First of all, I do complain about never having enough time to get the house cleaned or whatever else I dread yet I try to stay caught up on all of my shows.
I get depressed and overwhelmed easily and it makes me feel better to escape into other people's worlds (aka: tv) Usually I sleep and avoid life.
Do you feel better now knowing that?
Secondly, our personal finances and business finances are separate. The freezer, ice machine and any other restaurant supplies/equipment are paid for out of the business account. Due to the constant crappy state of the economy and the amount of things that break and need replacing on a regular basis in the restaurant world, there is never a ton of expendable cash (spare pennies) milling about.
My "brand new expensive Escalade" is 4 years old and my payments are the same as they were with my Suburban. It does have half as many miles on it and is in perfect condition.
Any other riveting questions or comments?
Now, so you can laugh at my misfortune and idiocy, here are:
Stupid things I did last week.
I bought some Nair facial hair remover. I have blond hair on my face (it could be worse, if my hair was dark I would be a woodland creature) and my sister got me a small facial shaver (because sh e said I have a beard). I am not big on shaving my face for numerous reasons so I got the Nair.
It was supposed to stay on for at least 5 minutes but after 3, it burned like a bitch so I wiped it off. It left burned, course, twisty hair behind. I washed my face 4 times and put on 3 layers of Clinique Moisture Surge moisturizer.
My face was bumpy and I had a chemical burn for 2 days.
Yesterday I used the stupid shaver.
I was trying to hang the hummingbird feeder and stepped into the hole that Molly dug under it. I went down (as my sister and I say, big girls fall hard) I went down but managed to avoid spilling a drop of sugar water. I sat there and laughed for a full 5 minutes before I considered crying from the pain. Then all 4 dogs accosted me and licked my face and arms while I tried to get up. Thank god there were no witnesses.
I ran my bath this morning and somehow forgot to turn the cold water on. I stepped in and almost incinerated myself. I avoided screaming and waking the entire house up but just barely. I have actually done this before except in reverse. The cold water isn't as bad.
I unloaded the entire dishwasher the other day before I realized that I had put the soap in it and forgot to push start.
We spent the afternoon Sunday desperately looking for khaki shorts for the little one, who had to have them for his upcoming Disney trip. The mall closed at 6pm, we got there at 5 and managed to hit 4 stores (buying various shorts but none of them khaki) before finally hitting the jackpot at Marshall's. The little one was pissed because he hates shopping and hates trying on clothes which made him crabby and made my husband and I want to strangle him. It is near impossible to find long shorts for a boy/man with freakishly long legs. We survived and I was so relieved that we were able to get the purchases early instead of last minute (like usual).
Yesterday, we got an email from the band director saying that since the kids thought khaki would clash with the neon yellow t-shirts, they could wear any shorts they wished and to disregard the khakis.
The good news is, he now has lots of new shorts and we found a long pair of swim trunks.
Now I need to convince him that he must wear sunblock in Florida.
I spent weeks using the Jergen's facial tanning moisturizer to give my face a lovely glow. I pretty much burned the tan off with the chemicals so now I am white, splotchy and bumpy. Yea me!
I was sooooo happy to get my Sephora purchases last week. I could not wait to use the Urban Decay shadow palette and Fresh Coral lip balm. The perfume was lovely in the store.
I don't like any of them.
Although the shadows look great in the box, they are awful on me and the coral lip balm is way too bright and I look like a hoochie. The perfume gave me a terrible headache. They are all going back and I am going to shop in the store (Sephora) instead of online in the future. The eyeshadow did stay on really well though and I love the lip balm in the Rose and Plum so I plan to just get different colors of each.
In the last 2 weeks, I have dropped and broke the flip-top lids on a.) my Mrs. Meyers floor cleaner bottle b.) my sesame oil body moisturizer c.) my new shampoo and d.) my lotion bottle
No alcohol was ever involved.
In other stupid news, last year while I was making hummingbird food every single day for those fat pigs, I for got to add sugar to one of the batches and didn't realize it until I tasted it 4 days later to see why they weren't eating it (and why they were trying to peck my eyeballs out every time I stepped out the back door.
I have also (in the past) worn my underwear inside out and backward, worn 2 different shoes (both were black flats), left my phone at restaurants 3 different times, worn mascara on only one eye (I have invisible lashes) left Molly locked outside almost all night (I blame Mr. Funny but he swears it was me), bought the same magazine in the store that I had just gotten in the mail (I have done this a few times), fed the dogs and then an hour later fed them again and put my car keys in the fridge.